I have to attend a wedding tommorow is it alright if i wear black?

by leony on March 8, 2010

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I have to attend a wedding tommorow its an evening wedding .I have never attended an American wedding before. So i was wondering if i can wear a traditional Indian dress , or do u have to wear western only… Also the dress im planning to wear is black and grey in color. Is that an appropriate color for a wedding over here. Also wat kind of accesories, jewelry, etc etc should i wear.
And another question, what should i make my 4 yr old son wear?

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{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }

Jenny K March 8, 2010 at 8:31 am

Go on the safe side. & wear something other than black. =)

DonaldM March 8, 2010 at 8:35 am

Black and grey are not appropriate colors for a dress to wear to a wedding. You can wear traditional Indian dress if you want, just not those colors.

SweetCountryLily March 8, 2010 at 8:42 am

My best friends mom wore black to her own daughter’s (my best friend’s) wedding. Its not HUGELY looked down upon. In the US we just look at black being associated with funerals. But honestly, wear what you are the most comfortable in! People aren’t going to stress about what you or your son are wearing! They will just be happy you are coming!!!

Meg March 8, 2010 at 9:17 am

I have been to plenty of weddings where I and many other women have been wearing black. I live on the East coast, for what it’s worth, so I don’t know if it is different in the Midwest or the South.

Personally, I would think wearing traditional Indian dress was pretty awesome. The only issue I can see is if the ceremony is in a really conservative church, people might be offended if it’s an outfit where your midriff shows.

baaah March 8, 2010 at 9:24 am

black is fine if you have something bold to bring out the dullness of black.. like shoes with some color and a colored bag with a silver necklace or something, black isnt bad to wear you just got to rock it!

toygal March 8, 2010 at 9:57 am

Sure you can wear black. I just got married and my wedding party wore black. I was a wedding coordinator for years. Black has been very in style for a long time.

For those of you saying black is for funerals, black bridesmaid dresses have been featured in bridal magazines since 1991 at least.

The only thing I want to caution you on is that when you say Indian Dress are you suggesting one of the lovely long and flowing floor length ensembles I see Indian women wear?

What is not acceptable is for you to be dressed better than the bride, wedding party or the brides mothers. Find out how formal the wedding will be. Then even if you feel you can wear your Indian dress, tone it way down. Nothing shiny, no shiny threads in the cloth used in your garment, the jewelry should be very simple and not something that brings attention to you.

While I’m sure your planned attire would just blend in with the rest of the guests at a wedding in India, it would make you stand out and detract from the bride possibly. That would be considered rude by some. I would say error on the side of what does the bride justice. It is her day and no one elses where dresses are concerned..

Your 4 year old son this time of year can wear a polo shirt and nice shorts shorts. Keep the child comfortable. He will be likely to enjoy it all more and last longer being a good boy. Wedding can be hard on kids. The bride will appreciate your son having a chance to be on his best behavior and enjoying himself.

Yes do make sure he can come..We told everyone no kids younger than 10 because my autistic son would not sit through the wedding if he saw another child there. We explained to them the reason, and a close friend brought the kid anyways and my son was not even able to stay in the santuary during the service he was pacing all over from the kid being there.

When the parent asked later if it was ok, I told no and told her the impact on my son which she did know would happen. I tod her that it was very rude. My son will have no memory of seeing his mom get married.

Stephy March 8, 2010 at 10:47 am

GIRRRL! UR NOT GOING TO A FUNERAL UR GOING 2 A WEDDING!! SO…DO NOT WEAR BLACK :)

Jeanette March 8, 2010 at 11:31 am

generally speaking, black is traditionally worn to funerals here in the United States. However, my very dear friend was married this past March and her colors were red and black… black suits, dresses, and red roses… more roses than i have ever seen in one place…. contact the bride and find out what her colors are.. i would wear something that would not make me stand out as this is her day and you don’t want to steal any attention…

jm1970 March 8, 2010 at 12:00 pm

Is it a formal wedding? Black is fine…just not white! You can wear any jewerly that compliments your attire…no rules…..

I would say it is fine to wear your Indian attire, but I’m not the bride..what sort of people are they?

Was you 4 year old invited…be sure..that is a huge wedding error…if his name was not specifically on the invite or the invite didn’t say “and family” then he is not invited….children generally are not invited to weddings.

I’m guessing it is more formal if it is in the evening…so if your son was invited…pants and a nice shirt with a collar…I would even consider a shirt and tie.

PugMom March 8, 2010 at 12:33 pm

Ok, in the US, particularly in the Chicago area, 90% of the female guests will be wearing black so don’t worry about it. If you are of Indian descent then sure go ahead and wear your traditional dress, if not, then it will just look odd. Your 4 year old son, should look put together and clean, try to avoid jeans.

Kathleen March 8, 2010 at 12:37 pm

Traditionally you aren’t supposed to wear black to a wedding, but many of the embroidered saris I have seen are very beautiful. Dress slacks and a dress shirt would be appropriate for your son.

Baggs_999 March 8, 2010 at 1:10 pm

As long as you don’t wear white, you should be fine. The only color you absolutely should not where is white. The only person in white on a wedding is the bride.

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